37 Years Later, Dolly Parton’s Steel Magnolias Line Is Still The Greatest Quote On Grief

“Steel Magnolias” is one of those movies that always seems to be perpetually playing on television, not unlike the Best Picture Oscar-winning “Forrest Gump.” Both movies also take place in the South, depicting the trials and tribulations of characters in small towns as they confront the challenges of life, love, and loss. 

But whereas “Forrest Gump” follows a single man on his journey across touchstones of the history of the U.S., “Steel Magnolias” keeps the story isolated to a group of women played by Sally Field, Shirley MacLaine, Daryl Hannah, Olympia Dukakis, Julia Roberts, and the late Dolly Parton. Directed by Herbert Ross and written by Robert Harling, based on his own 1987 stage play of the same name, the film is both tragic and funny as we follow the ups, downs, and in-betweens of these charming and occasionally sassy ladies. 

Critics were mixed on the movie, with Hal Hinson of The Washington Post writing that the film “runs on gags, pitched to the cheapest seats, and maudlin emotion, pitched to the cheapest sentiments. The script (…) is on a degenerated line from Tennessee Williams by way of Hallmark cards.” Meanwhile, Roger Ebert praised the movie, writing, “‘Steel Magnolias’ is essentially a series of comic one-liners leading up to a teary tragedy, but let it be said that the one-liners are mostly funny and the tragedy deserves most, but not all, of the tears.”

The laughter and the tears are exactly why we’re talking about “Steel Magnolias” now, as it’s full of delightful quips and barbs alongside sentiments that might feel like greeting card schmaltz but still pack charm and an emotional punch. That’s especially the case when it comes to one of Parton’s memorable lines as Truvy Jones, the owner of a home-salon where the Southern women frequently congregate.

One of the driving forces of “Steel Magnolias” is Julia Roberts as Shelby Eatenton-Latcherie, a role for which she earned an Academy Award nomination for Best Supporting Actress. Shelby has type 1 diabetes, which turns her hope for having children into a health risk. Sadly, as Shelby pursues her motherly desire, the pregnancy damages her kidneys, and she’s forced to go on dialysis. But Shelby’s mother, Mary Lynn “M’Lynn” Eatenton (Sally Field) is able to donate a kidney to help save her from further grief. 

Unfortunately, Shelby dies due to an infection caused by the suppressive therapy that keeps her body from rejecting the kidney. Stuck unconscious in a hospital, Shelby’s family makes the difficult decision to take her off life support. 

After the funeral, M’Lynn is overwhelmed. In a burst of emotion, she swings dramatically through pain, anger, sadness, and disbelief, but then there’s a bit of laughter. M’Lynn expresses that she “just wants to hit somebody” until they feel as bad as she does. That’s when M’Lynn’s friend Clairee Belcher (Olympia Dukakis) offers up Louisa “Ouiser” Boudreaux (Shirley Maclaine) for M’Lynn to punch, much to Ouiser’s disbelief and the shock of the other women. It’s a hilarious moment that eases the tension and offers some relief. 

In the aftermath, M’Lynn apologizes for her emotional outburst, but Truvy offers consolation by saying: 

“Laughter through tears is my favorite emotion.”

You can see the Hallmark-tinged vibe of a line like that, but being cheesy doesn’t make it any less true. In the shadow of tragedy, laughing through tears offers a welcome break from the exhaustion of grief. After the death of a loved one, you may even find yourself making dark jokes to cope with the sadness and anger that you feel, and that’s okay. You don’t have to laugh to keep from crying. Instead, you can laugh through the tears.

Here are some other memorable quotes from “Steel Magnolias,” each with its own charm:

“Smile! It increases your face value.” –  Truvy Jones

“Well, you know what they say: if you don’t have anything nice to say about anybody, come sit by me!” — Clairee Belcher

“I’m not crazy, I’ve just been in a very bad mood 40 years!” — Ouiser Boudreaux

“Honey, time marches on, and eventually, you realize it is marchin’ across your face.” — Truvy Jones

“The only thing that separates us from the animals is our ability to accessorize.” — Clairee Belcher

“I would rather have 30 minutes of wonderful than a lifetime of nothing special.” — Shelby Eatenton-Latcherie

“A dirty mind is a terrible thing to waste.” — Ouiser Boudreaux

“I have a strict policy that nobody cries alone in my presence.” — Truvy Jones